hollow inside

Sometimes you feel so empty inside that you wonder if you are a human being at all.
The everchanging milieu fails to ignite that glow inside of you. What do you do then? Of course, had there been a specific reason then the root of such attitude could be easily curbed. But, what if you have no idea about the root cause? You are numb, helpless, detached to the world around you. Could the reason be inclined towards spirituality? You try to find meanings, meanings from objects, faces, dreams…if you do dream…You try deriving a reason behind things you see and things you do not. You want to travel alone, you want to listen music alone. The bottomline, You just want to be left alone.
The sight and sound of well-meaning friends hits your nerve. The mindless blabbering of that female next to you reminds you that your mother is a “lady”. Suddenly, you realize that you miss your mom. You brood over it. You cannot do anything though besides calling her up. To top it all, she takes the call after six rings only to tell you that she is busy at the moment. The emotion welled up inside of you and ready to be outpoured to your mother’s ears disintegrates into tiny pieces and each of those tiny pieces pokes you when its least needed.
Looking up at the grey sky, you decide its safe to take a walk. The grey sky does not bother you and you do not carry an umbrella. Suddenly after a few steps, a drop of water lands on your forehead…and before you know it, there’s water everywhere. What do you do? You shout for the taxi and you are home again. Back to where you were just a few minutes earlier. You curse yourself. You almost slam your tired cellphone to the floor. And now, you and I, we are here…hitting the keys…Get a life!!!